From my kitchen to yours

From my kitchen to yours

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

COUNT AT LEAST UPTO .....9




Is it me or are there a few like me..
That jabber a lot ..
But when it comes to saying something that you want to say the most...
You just stutter and stop...
Or sometimes make such a mess of it all....
That instead of making it better..you just put up a wall...

I think that sometimes..
I need to stay quiet and say nothing at all...
Count ...at least up to ...9..
That's what I want to do this year...
But realise that either I blurt out all the wrong stuff..
or then I just sit , with a finger on my lip...

And stay that way..
Till I cant handle the silence in my heart no more..
And then blurt some insane stuff out , some more..
That I should never have ever said...or then , have thought of what to say a little before..

Is there no other way , to say what I want..without sometimes making a mess and then feeling complete distress..

I'm trying to understand why I do what I do..
Should I blame it on being Sagittarius...because that is true..
We are supposed to say what we feel...
and gallop around..
Half horse-Half man.. that's exactly what it's all about...
Peter-Pan that's my man, he refused to grow up...
and stayed back in Neverland..
But we all know , he does not exist, he is just a figment of someones very fertile imagination..
Like the stories I have made up in my head , that are totally amiss...

So where should I go...
Because sometimes feel I'm no different than Zeke and Zene...
they feel what they feel and say it like it is..
They eat when they are hungry, smile when they are happy, sleep when they are sleepy and cry when they are hurt..
And if I ask them whats bothering them, they spare no facts...
And that is so wonderful..
To be so straight like that..

I want to stay a kid..
and feel my way through life with my heart...
Say what I feel, but without hurting anyone...
Cross roads when I have to, jump over a puddle , only of I have to....
Sleep at the drop of a hat, which I sometimes do , when I want to..
And find joy in the simplest of things..
A worm on a leaf..
A star in the sky..
Chocolate in the fridge..
Mums high heel to try....
Drinking cold water..
An extra hour of tv..
Oh it feels soo good to be a little crazy...


So that's the plan..to help me walk the land..
I'm gonna aim for the moon , so that by default I reach at least the stars..
Laugh till tears roll down my cheeks and I cant breathe..
wake up some nights and stare at the moon..
And drink my green tea, just stupidly with a spoon..
I'm gonna eat, love, dance , pray , laugh and hug and feel insanely pretty ....
I'm just gonna stay and be the purest form of me...

11 comments:

  1. How I feel oh so lovely after reading this! Going back in times... Maria! Incredibly wonderful:)

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  2. Been reading your blog and following you on twitter for a while now. Be just as you are and don't change. Change but only if you want to not because others want you to. Keep on writing and I will keep on reading. From the other side of the world, in Toronto, I am Sneha and I love reading your blogs. I am also a mom to three little ones. Totally connect with you.

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  3. Dear Sangeeta,
    Awww...thank you ...

    Dear Sneha,
    Oh wow, how close has this world of ours become, i don't think I'm gonna change..
    but thank you ..and stay happy

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  4. Yes there are more,I so relate to “But when it comes to saying something that you want to say the most...You just stutter and stop...Or sometimes make such a mess of it all....That instead of making it better..you just put up a wall...” & “But realise that either I blurt out all the wrong stuff.. or then I just sit , with a finger on my lip...And stay that way..Till I cant handle the silence in my heart no more..And then blurt some insane stuff out , some more..That I should never have ever said.” if only I hadn’t held things within thinking I can & then blurted out stuff & made it even messier,if only……but then,this is ME *shrug*
    & yeah You dont need to change or else you'll be unhappy,God Bless & even more the ones who r around us lo ;)

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  5. YOur little angel's name is Zene Zoe.... My oldest, my only daughter's name is Zen. When we were having our third one, we had selected Zoe for a girl and Kabir for a boy and we got Kabir. NOt that we don't love him but Zen sometimes wishes we had zoe and not kabir as growing up with two boys is torture.SO there you have both the names that we loved for a girl in your little one's name. Though zen is working on her father to let her have a middle name and not a traditional father's name as middle name. Dad does not want to let go of that connection with his little one, so let's see wher that goes. If she gets her way her name will be zen Rewa. Zen was my husband's choice and Rewa was mine. Why am I writing all this here? Next time I will count upto 9,,, in English, french and spanish and Gujarati

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  6. Dear Haj,
    Thanks for spending time here with me ...

    Dear Sneha,
    Ha ha ha ha ...we'll dont count till...9 if what you gonna say is gonna make you and the person you saying to feel bette..
    and wow you have three kids...thats so cool..
    I would love to have twins ...but Oh well...
    As for Zen, i love that name..wanted it when i had Zeke...
    But loved Zeke...why am i rambling...guess its because ..im not counting... ha ha ha

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  7. hey maria..Lovely thoughts,beautifully written...i truly empathize with you(I am a saggitarius too..;)..)...-KIRAN MISAL

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  8. See that's what happens when I ramble. I don't have twins. I was mad enough to go through three pregnancies and three c sections cause we always wanted three kids. There was no closure at 2 so there u go, misunderstanding cleared. We did love seeing little zeke in Salaam Namaste. I remember it cause that was the winter when it was freezing cold outside and snowing and in the house I had my two year old insisting that she wants her bikini on and would be running round the house singing thetitle song and dancing. I was a fairly new at Home Mom at that time and going totally ballistic thinking what the heck is happening here. BTW the other connection to you is that I am also a bambaiya, so kind of like reading what's happening in amchi mumbai and living in toronto.

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  9. Dear Kiran,
    ha ha ha so ya..we great at making a mess , when we actually rying to make it all better...

    Dear Sneha,
    ha ha ha i Really enjoy reading your stories..
    You stay happy ...

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  10. Maria..ur blog is contagious...i keep comin back t read ur blog just to fil myself up with love..and i have developed this foot in mouth habit of urs..is dat contagious too?...hahaha...y are you not writing up?wtz keepin u busyyyy missy!

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  11. Dear Aashi,
    well to answer both your questions, you cannot Have a rainbow, unless you dont have rain..
    and as for " foot in mouth" its contagious...

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